Undoing the weaving and redoing it

I was born into the religion and remained a Lutheran till my early teens. I was a very active church participant. I attended all services. I taught Sunday School. I played the organ. I belonged to the choir. I spent time almost every day involved in something to do with the church. It was woven into my life. Like a big ancient tapestry. It was the tapestry of my spiritual life. But there was one loose thread. I was gay. And at some point that became an issue in my religious/cultural life experience.  I couldn’t remain a practicing Lutheran and remain an out gay person. This is back in the early 1980s. Attitudes in the church have changed since then. But I needed to pull that thread and unravel the tapestry I had created for so many years.
For quite a while I remained spiritually inactive. I was spiritually dead. But a part of me kept yearning for something of the spiritual life. I kept randomly getting books about spiritual matters. I kept talking to others about the issue. And soon enough I was exposed to alternative religions and thought.
I was drawn to the earth based religions. I took up heathenry because my family background is German. I followed this path for many years. But I needed a spirituality that was more balanced on the feminine side. Heathenry in my experience was a very masculine path. Yet Druidry was a much more balanced path to my thinking. So I started exploring that path and reweaving my spiritual tapestry. It has been a wonderful task. I became a member of OBOD. I studied the lore. I started to practice trance sessions to find out more about the other realms. In these trance sessions I encountered many of the deities of this path. I currently have a very lively relationship with the deities due to this.
I have been reweaving the tapestry of my spiritual life. It has been a wonderful experience for me. I have been able to add new threads of different colors. I have slowly been creating a new way of experiencing my life and reality. I now have a much stronger connection to my ancestors. I am much more in touch with nature as an adult. I have a strong connection to the deities. All of the multiverse is alive for me now. I am a much happier person. As with everything it is a process. But I keep weaving and creating a beautiful new tapestry of spirituality. I have found peace.

Author: vitkimusings

A fifty-something Vitki living in the suburbs of Chicago. Follower of the Nordic Path for the last fifteen years. Student of runes for the last 23 years and seidr for the last seven years. Always learning and growing!

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